Waking Up

She comes to the pool every monday, wednesday, friday at 6:15. About one hour later she hops up onto the deck, swings her legs around and looks straight at me. When this happens, I reflexively pull myself out my early morning daze. What is MJ going to say today? Judging by her pastry-like skin and wispy cream colored hair, MJ is most likely in her late 80's. She's one of the sweetest (and the sauciest) old ladies I've ever met. Just the other day she said to me... "Kim, whenever I get out of the pool I can see that my birthday suit needs ironing." and "Never get old. It's no d*** fun." Other than saying thee most unexpected things, I have also witnessed MJ frequently spank fellow pool-goers and throw (soft) objects at them. Good thing she is well loved, or else we probably would have to kick her out.

He comes on tuesday, thursday at 11:30 with his wife, but that doesn't stop him from occasionally flirting with the lifeguard. He told me that I have nice legs and that I could sit on his lap if I ever got tired of the chair. One time I brought my water bottle in with me and he asked me if I had vodka in it. Somehow, these otherwise offensive comments become undeniably amusing because he is probably almost old enough to be my great grandfather.

None of this really has to do with my mission but when this happened does.  Many of you know the hour in which missionaries are expected to wake up each morning--6:30 in the A stinking M. You know who's out at 6:30 in the morning? Stars. The moon. Raccoons and other nocturnal animals.  It's so early that it's still night. I don't do early. They say "early bird gets the worm?" yeah, well so do late nights. My theories on waking up at the crack of dawn closely parallel that of my twinner, Zooey Deschanel: "In an ideal world, no one would talk before 10 am. People would just hug, because waking up is really hard." It IS hard. THE most difficult. Willfully leave the cozy cocoon I've spent the past 8 hours regulating to the perfect temperature and step into the chill of the empty morning air? No thank you.
Knowing this about me, my Heavenly Father set me up with a little practice. Immediately when I moved back home and started working at the Y again, I was given the early morning shift. Now I wake up at 5:30 and I've only been legitimately late once. If this isn't a miracle, I truly do not know what is.